a new start

Blogging is something new for me.

It always struck me as something *not* for me...why would anyone want to read my ramblings? I don't write particularly well (ironic, given my job). It seemed self indulgent, somehow. *This* seems self indulgent. I am cringing as I type. The fact that I typed "I am cringing..." makes me cringe even more.

But the more I think about it, the more I realise it might just help me.

I'm quiet in real life, a listener, not a talker. That doesn't mean I don't have things to say. Often, I feel very inadequate because I don't say much. I feel I must be boring.

I've been thinking very recently and figure that it's OK that I don't say much. For so long, one of my favourite quotes has been "go quietly amidst the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence." It's time I stopped liking that, and started living it. Ceasing to fight against my quiet nature may just help me to find the peace I claim to seek.

Why seek peace, and be looking for more opportunities to add to the noise of the world at the same time?

I've always felt there's not enough listening in the world, while at the same time feeling I don't contribute because I don't say much in places where already everyone is just waiting for you to stop speaking so they can jump in. Maybe my contribution is saying nothing. Maybe that's what I am meant to do.

And of course, instead, I will just ramble here to any poor soul that happens to stumble across my blog... They'll become the peace-seekers then!